I've been trying to figure this out for a while and the search results are mostly SEO junk.
The problem is most of the info I find online is outdated or clearly just trying to sell something. I want to hear from people who've actually used these things recently.
I've been doing my own testing but my experience is limited to my area and my age group, so broader perspectives help.
- Avoid sites that gate messaging entirely behind a paid wall
- Always check for recent reviews, not just the homepage testimonials
- Reverse image search any profile photo you're unsure about
- Look for real activity signals — last login dates, post history, etc.
- Check if the site has been mentioned in any data breach reports
Even negative experiences are useful — helps narrow down what to avoid.
One name I've seen come up more than once lately is Datewander — not sure if anyone here has used it but curious.