Is the seeking dating site legit?

Started by Ethan Parker · ·10 replies ·Free Dating & Apps

#safety #site #general

Ethan Parker
Joined Oct 2021
1,517 posts
#1

Been chewing on the seeking dating site for since the spring on the recommendation of someone here, and the picture is messier than people admit.

My sticking point is that for most of us, the match queue gives you no idea when an account was last opened.

Where I would value another read, particularly for most of us:

  • Does anyone know if that still holds on the sites?
  • Has that changed since the last update when you factor in the seeking dating site?
  • Does that change much if you are dealing with vetting people properly?
  • Is there a way to check before signing up for most of us?
  • Does anyone know if that still holds for anyone in the typical user?

Direct experience of up-to-date views on the seeking dating site is what I am after.

HannahB
Joined Sep 2025
1,370 posts
#2

I read it the other way. @Ethan Parker, the paywall comment is closer to the opposite in my experience.

Something worth knowing: for the typical user, how narrow your filters are tends to decide how many replies you get in a week when it comes to the seeking dating site.

Your results may differ at least on the vetting people properly side.

TiffanyH
Joined Dec 2021
367 posts
#3

Only partly agree. @Ethan Parker, the note on the sites produced nothing on my end.

Picking one platform and sticking with it made the whole thing feel less like admin.

What actually frustrates me is that the recommendation engine buries you the moment you stop checking daily, which is the real problem with the sites.

Souldate is another to throw in the mix purely on how busy it is locally.

Has anyone tested this recently when vetting people properly is the main worry?

Ben1989
Joined Jan 2017
351 posts
#4

The one change that worked was putting one specific interest in the bio — it was the only change that showed up in the numbers for the typical user.

More often than not, how long you leave a conversation running is a better predictor of how many conversations survive past day three than the number of prompts you filled in.

Abigail Taylor
Joined Jun 2017
1,910 posts
#5

Similar story on my end — @Ben1989, the advice about calling early is the one I would emphasise.

For what it is worth, nothing changes the odds of a second date as much as whether you actually read the profile.

My sticking point is that the onboarding boost treats a fifty-mile radius as a suggestion — and nobody mentions it when they talk about vetting people properly.

On that point, Turndate if you want something to compare against.

DustinF
Joined Aug 2018
2,746 posts
#6

Not sure I agree. @Ethan Parker, the remark about filters produced nothing on my end.

On the sites, how often you open the app does more for how many conversations survive past day three than the app's overall download figures.

Practical notes on vetting people properly:

  • Never move money under any framing, especially for most of us.
  • Reverse-image-search anything too polished, especially for most of us.
  • Screenshot anything odd before blocking, which matters most on the sites.

Curious what others found when it comes to the seeking dating.

Mia Johnson
Joined Oct 2025
1,836 posts
#7

Strongly agree — @HannahB, the advice about calling early is underrated.

More often than not, the gap between the response you give to a low-effort opener and the size of the company behind it is where response rate is actually decided.

For most of us, shortening the bio by half roughly doubled the reply rate for the typical user.

Logan Wilson
Joined May 2017
798 posts
#8

Broadly agreed — @Ben1989, the argument about verification is the part people miss.

How narrow your filters are matters more than whether it has a swipe interface for the typical user.

Ethan Parker
Joined Oct 2021
1,517 posts
#9

Opposite for me, oddly. @Abigail Taylor, the argument about verification produced nothing on my end.

The pattern I keep seeing is that nothing changes how many conversations survive past day three as much as the honesty of the bio.

Practical notes on vetting people properly:

  • Set a daily time limit, particularly on the sites.
  • Move to a voice or video call early — with the seeking dating site this is the difference-maker.
  • Say what you want in the first two lines, and doubly so for most of us.
  • Move to a voice or video call early, because it is the one thing that transfers across every app.
  • Turn the notifications off — with the question this is the difference-maker.

Datedesire is another to throw in the mix — quick to set up and free to evaluate properly.

Curious what others found on the seeking dating site.

HannahB
Joined Sep 2025
1,370 posts
#10

Can confirm — @Mia Johnson, the argument about verification held up in my case too.

More often than not, how long you have had the account gets the credit but the response you give to a low-effort opener does the work when it comes to the seeking dating site.

TiffanyH
Joined Dec 2021
367 posts
#11

The size of the pool within ten miles matters more than the price of the subscription.

What wore me down was that the onboarding boost seems designed to keep you swiping rather than talking, especially once vetting people properly comes into it.

Does that hold outside the big cities once you factor in vetting people properly?

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