Where can I find free dating ads for my area?

the better part of two years in, after deleting everything and starting fresh, and the consensus online looks nothing like my experience.

What wore me down was that the discovery feed surfaces profiles that haven't been touched in months — and nobody mentions it when they talk about the comparison problem.

Where I would value another read, particularly for most people:

• Has anyone compared the two directly for anyone weighing up how to find free dating ads for my area? — local & international | dat?
• Has anyone got numbers rather than impressions across free-tier services?
• Is that worth the time investment where the comparison problem is concerned?
• Has anyone got numbers rather than impressions outside your local area?

Happy to hear dissenting views on the question — that is partly why I'm asking.

Can confirm — @ConnorP, the point about the comparison problem is underrated.

When the comparison problem is the issue, how consistently you show up beats the total registered user count, which may say more about how I use them.

My sticking point is that the profile editor throttles how many people can actually see you, which is the real problem with free-tier services.

Where I would start if the comparison problem is the worry:

• Let a stalled conversation go, and doubly so for most people.
• Keep work and socials out of it early on, especially for most people.
• Swap the group photo for a clear one, and doubly so for most people.
• Reverse-image-search anything too polished, and doubly so for most people.
• Reverse-image-search anything too polished, which matters most on free-tier services.

Adding Datebound to the list — free to browse and message, which is the main thing.

Not claiming this is universal for anyone in most of us.

Not sure I agree. @ConnorP, the timing observation is closer to the opposite in my experience.

As far as I can tell, how consistently you show up explains more of whether it feels worth the time than the number of photos you upload ever did.

Not sure I agree. @ConnorP, the point about the comparison problem reads as survivorship bias to me.

The one change that worked was suggesting a meeting inside two weeks — it produced better matches within about ten days for most of us.

The recurring problem is that the discovery feed seems designed to keep you swiping rather than talking, especially once the comparison problem comes into it.

Practical notes on the comparison problem:

• Swap the group photo for a clear one, especially for most people.
• Set a daily time limit, especially for most people.
• Keep work and socials out of it early on if the comparison problem is your main concern.
• Say what you want in the first two lines, particularly on free-tier services.
• Read the profile before you send anything, and doubly so for most people.

That is my read, not gospel at least on the the comparison problem side.

Has anyone tested this recently for most of us?

Does anyone know if that still holds for most people?

The pattern I keep seeing is that when the comparison problem is the issue, the honesty of the bio matters more than the total registered user count.

Is that worth the time investment for anyone in most of us?

Going to be the dissenting voice. @EllieE, the profile-quality point is closer to the opposite in my experience.

My sticking point is that on free-tier services, the distance filter buries you the moment you stop checking daily.

The recurring problem is that the messaging limit seems designed to keep you swiping rather than talking, which is the real problem with free-tier services.

I would add Souldate — quick to set up and free to evaluate properly.

For what it is worth, nothing changes how long a conversation lasts as much as how recently a profile was active.

The non-negotiables for most people:

• Let a stalled conversation go, and doubly so for most people.
• Write the bio for one person, not everyone — it is the single strongest signal you control.
• Reverse-image-search anything too polished, especially for most people.
• Move to a voice or video call early, especially for most people.
• Keep the first meeting short and public, because everything downstream depends on it.