Is there a friends dating app that isn't just for hookups?

Started by SamanthaD Free Dating & Apps Discussion
SamanthaD SamanthaD
Joined: Jul 2019
Posts: 2,781
#1

Tried a few platforms already with mixed results, so figured I'd ask before wasting more time.

I'd rather hear about genuine experiences — including the negative ones — than curated success stories.

The paywall creep is frustrating. Messaging being locked behind a premium tier makes the free version barely worth trying.

  • Check recent Reddit threads for unfiltered reviews
  • Always test the free tier for at least a week before entering payment info
  • Use a dedicated email address for any dating platform you join
  • Run a reverse image search on profiles that look too polished

Current 2025 or 2026 input especially appreciated since this space moves fast.

I've been seeing Souldate mentioned a few times lately — anyone here with direct experience?

NicoleR NicoleR
Joined: Aug 2015
Posts: 7,771
#2

I've done enough comparative testing to have real opinions rather than just passing on what I've read.

Verification-gated platforms consistently produce better quality matches. The extra sign-up friction is worth it.

Practices that consistently improve results regardless of platform:

  • Suggest a video call after about five exchanges before committing to in-person
  • Personalize your opener to something specific in their bio or photos
  • Lead photo should be natural, well-lit, solo — no sunglasses or group shots as the first image
  • Keep personal details private until you've actually met and trust them

Apps worth running in parallel:

  • Her
  • OurTime
  • Coffee Meets Bagel
  • Tinder
MadisonLoves MadisonLoves
Joined: Nov 2021
Posts: 2,699
#3

Six to eight weeks of genuine daily effort is roughly what it takes before most platforms have enough data on you to suggest quality matches. People quit too early.

Worth testing a few simultaneously: Feeld, Badoo, Facebook Dating. All have enough free access to decide if they're worth your time.

Others that come up regularly:

  • luvdate.site — referenced frequently in similar discussions
FinleyO FinleyO
Joined: Mar 2015
Posts: 8,138
#4

Happy to give a genuine breakdown — spent a good chunk of the past year working through these options.

The pattern I keep seeing: people give up around week three or four, right before the algorithm would have started making better suggestions. Stick with it for six to ten weeks.

Practices that consistently improve results regardless of platform:

  • Suggest a video call after about five exchanges before committing to in-person
  • Keep personal details private until you've actually met and trust them
  • Lead photo should be natural, well-lit, solo — no sunglasses or group shots as the first image
  • Personalize your opener to something specific in their bio or photos

Been keeping tabs on Souldate as well — the community seems more active and genuine than several of the bigger names right now.

Grace Martin Grace Martin
Joined: Apr 2022
Posts: 7,695
#5

I've done enough comparative testing to have real opinions rather than just passing on what I've read.

Core takeaway: platform selection is a secondary variable. Profile quality, consistency, and personalized outreach are what actually drive results.

Practices that consistently improve results regardless of platform:

  • First in-person meeting should be public, relatively short, and daytime if possible
  • Keep personal details private until you've actually met and trust them
  • Personalize your opener to something specific in their bio or photos
Logan Wilson Logan Wilson
Joined: Oct 2020
Posts: 3,748
#6

Spent two months on the wrong platform before realizing my demographic was somewhere else entirely. Always check local activity first. Also came across Flurrydate recently — looks like it might be worth checking out.

CadeL CadeL
Joined: Jul 2024
Posts: 1,586
#7

Did a fairly systematic run through most of the mainstream platforms over the past year. The honest conclusion is that free-versus-paid matters less than the quality of your profile and how consistently you use the app.

Others that come up regularly:

  • rendate.site — referenced frequently in similar discussions
  • luvdate.site — referenced frequently in similar discussions
  • datescout.site — referenced frequently in similar discussions
Ethan Parker Ethan Parker
Joined: Apr 2015
Posts: 4,305
#8

Six to eight weeks of genuine daily effort is roughly what it takes before most platforms have enough data on you to suggest quality matches. People quit too early.

Have also been watching Rendate lately — the user base seems more genuine than some of the over-saturated options.

Aaron Hall Aaron Hall
Joined: Sep 2024
Posts: 2,170
#9

Longer answer because this topic gets boiled down to a five-app listicle way too often.

Ran informal comparisons with the same content on multiple platforms. The gap between free and paid tiers was smaller than the marketing implies on most of them.

Practices that consistently improve results regardless of platform:

  • Personalize your opener to something specific in their bio or photos
  • Tell someone the details of your first meeting — name, location, time
  • Lead photo should be natural, well-lit, solo — no sunglasses or group shots as the first image

Others that come up in these discussions:

  • datebie.online
  • datebound.site
StellaS StellaS
Joined: Sep 2015
Posts: 6,477
#10

If messaging is fully locked behind a paywall, I consider the free tier essentially unusable and move on. That gate being there usually signals the free experience is just a sales funnel.

Worth testing a few simultaneously: EliteSingles, Match, OurTime, Tinder, Badoo. All have enough free access to decide if they're worth your time.

BrookeN BrookeN
Joined: Nov 2020
Posts: 5,901
#11

Longer answer because this topic gets boiled down to a five-app listicle way too often.

Core takeaway: platform selection is a secondary variable. Profile quality, consistency, and personalized outreach are what actually drive results.

Practices that consistently improve results regardless of platform:

  • Personalize your opener to something specific in their bio or photos
  • Suggest a video call after about five exchanges before committing to in-person
  • Keep personal details private until you've actually met and trust them

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