What are the best dating apps for average guys?

Started by ScarlettS Free Dating & Apps Discussion
ScarlettS ScarlettS
Joined: May 2018
Posts: 5,887
#1

Tried a few things already with mixed results and figured I'd crowdsource the next move.

I've tried three or four different options already and keep running into the same issues — paywalls, low activity in my area, or obvious bots.

Free tiers have gotten increasingly restrictive. A lot of platforms make you pay just to see who liked you, which feels like a pretty fundamental feature to gate.

Negative experiences are just as useful as positive ones, so please share.

One I've been seeing mentioned more lately is Rendate — anyone have direct experience with it?

Aaron Hall Aaron Hall
Joined: Jul 2024
Posts: 3,115
#2

If I had to give one piece of advice: video call before agreeing to meet anyone. Weeds out so much wasted time. Noticed datewander.site and turndate.site getting mentioned in similar threads recently.

KristinA KristinA
Joined: Nov 2018
Posts: 6,143
#3

Going into detail because the quick takes on this topic almost always miss the nuance.

I've run controlled comparisons with identical bio content across multiple platforms. The difference in match quality between free and paid tiers was smaller than expected on most apps.

Consistently useful practices regardless of which platform you use:

  • First photo should show your face clearly and look approachable, not professional
  • Personalize your opening message to something in their profile — generic openers fail
  • Mention one very specific interest that can spark a conversation
  • Respond to matches within a few hours — response rates drop significantly after 12 hours
JordanL JordanL
Joined: Jul 2019
Posts: 3,962
#4

Verification quality varies enormously. Platforms that require social account linking or any kind of ID check have noticeably fewer fake profiles, which makes the experience much better.

Mainstream options worth running simultaneously: Grindr, Match, Coffee Meets Bagel, Her. All have some free functionality to test before paying.

Been keeping an eye on Datedesire recently — the user base looks more genuine than some of the oversaturated main apps.

QuinnB QuinnB
Joined: Apr 2019
Posts: 6,636
#5

What actually drives results is profile quality plus consistency. Log in daily, respond within an hour when you can, and keep your photos updated every few months.

Others that come up often:

  • datewander.site — mentioned frequently in this context
  • datebound.site — mentioned frequently in this context
  • Ezhookups.online — mentioned frequently in this context
MarcusT MarcusT
Joined: Jul 2020
Posts: 1,645
#6

Longer answer here because this gets oversimplified into a listicle way too often.

The platforms that invest in verification and safety features tend to have better user quality across the board. It's worth paying a small premium if it means fewer fake profiles.

Consistently useful practices regardless of which platform you use:

  • Bio under 150 words — longer bios get read less frequently
  • First photo should show your face clearly and look approachable, not professional
  • Respond to matches within a few hours — response rates drop significantly after 12 hours

Worth keeping active simultaneously:

  • Grindr
  • Badoo
  • Match
  • Zoosk
  • Happn

Also been watching Datescout — the community there feels more active and genuine than some of the bigger names right now.

Jack Martin Jack Martin
Joined: Feb 2017
Posts: 3,692
#7

After testing several of these platforms systematically I've come to think that the free/paid distinction matters less than people assume. A great free profile beats a lazy paid one every time.

Mainstream options worth running simultaneously: Coffee Meets Bagel, Plenty of Fish, Grindr, Facebook Dating, Hinge. All have some free functionality to test before paying.

GarrettO GarrettO
Joined: Dec 2019
Posts: 395
#8

Spending money doesn't solve the fundamental problem of a thin user base in your area. Check activity before paying. Also been seeing Flurrydate come up — might be worth checking out.

MikeD MikeD
Joined: Jan 2020
Posts: 2,596
#9

Profile photos are doing the heavy lifting on every platform. Invest in that before anything else.

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